The Good Muslim

Growing up as Muslim in the United Kingdom, I have lived most of my life not thinking in any systematic way about the friendships or relationships I have formed outside those of my immediate family. Friendships just happened; sometimes they were good and sometimes they were short-lived. I grew up in a nuclear family with no near or distant relatives and less than a handful of trips to Pakistan where I was born. My social milieu was made up of British people largely of non-Muslim origin. My parents, who would be categorised as first-generation immigrants to the United Kingdom, were from educated backgrounds and in the main became friends with other middle-class Muslims. We socialised with them and their children were our peers. Yet, looking back on these years, I confess I never really forged what I would call true friendships with the children. My friends were people with whom I went to school, college, and then university. And today in my professional context my friends are still largely from non-Muslim backgrounds. They are nominal and practising Christians and Jews as well as agnostics and humanists. This has not happened through any deliberate intent but as a result of the nature of my employment, the environment where I work, and, consequently, the kind of people I meet. Many of these people have become friends in whom I choose to confide and put my trust.