This volume offers a survey of the practices of reproductive donation and a discussion of the social and ethical issues that these may raise. Our focus is on collaborative, or third-party reproduction. Here a child is not conceived through sexual intercourse by the parents, but rather the conception is likely to take place in a clinic with others involved in providing the eggs, sperm, embryo or sometimes the uterus in which the fetus grows. Typically in collaborative reproduction, roles are separated, so that these third-party progenitors do not become parents and usually play no part in the lives of the children they help to create. Indeed, it is often the case in collaborative reproduction that the children are unaware of the part that others have played. Within the technologies and practices of assisted reproduction, a child can have up to five progenitors: a social mother, a social father, a biological father (sperm provider), a biological mother (egg provider) and a surrogate (gestational) mother.

There are a number of different reasons why people may turn to collaborative reproduction. It can provide a means of overcoming infertility. So where, for example, a man’s sperm is defective or not produced in sufficient quantity, or a woman no longer has viable eggs because of her age, gametes (egg or sperm) from a third party can provide a substitute. Without such collaborative reproduction, their only other possibility of having a child would be to adopt. The main difference, obviously, is that an adopted child is not a blood relative of either parent.

Introduction

In families in which parents conceived using donated sperm or donated eggs, only one parent will be the genetic parent of the child: the mother in the case of sperm donation and the father in the case of egg donation. Parents can choose to tell or not to tell their child about their donor conception. In families in which parents choose not to tell, children will grow up unaware that the person that they think of as their mother or father is not, in fact, their genetic parent. Furthermore, families in which children were conceived using an anonymous donor will likely never be able to know detailed or identifying information about their donor. In countries where donor anonymity has ended and donor-conceived adults are able to access information about their donor, it is still the case that if someone does not know they were donor conceived they will have no reason to access information about their donor. Therefore, is it in the child’s best interests to be told about their donor conception?

This chapter outlines empirical research and ethical reasoning to discuss whether disclosure of donor origins is in a child’s best interests. Our discussion considers deontological (duty-based) and consequentialist (outcome-based) ethics in relation to disclosure. We hold that the question of whether to disclose can best be answered by reviewing at least three types of considerations for each child: (1) medical welfare; (2) family welfare; and (3) rights. These considerations build on the established empirical evidence presented in the first half of this chapter. Our intention is to clarify reasons why telling or not telling may be the best decision.

Introduction

Lesbian women and gay men become parents via a number of routes depending on national regulatory legislation, access to health care and the implementation of social policies affecting parenting. Obtaining gametes or embryos from a third party is not always an issue. Both men and women can have conceived children within heterosexual relationships; can adopt where it is legal; and can become the same-sex partner of someone who has a child conceived within a heterosexual relationship, and are therefore considered a co-parent or step-parent. Reproductive donation is involved when lesbians become mothers using sperm, eggs or embryos (the latter two usually only if the woman is infertile) from a donor who is anonymous, known or open-identity. Recent legislative changes in the UK now allow both women of a couple to be named on their child’s birth certificate. Lesbians and gay men can donate eggs and sperm, respectively, to lesbian or straight women and conceive a child with the intention of having or not having a parenting role. For a gay man to become a parent using reproductive donation he needs both a surrogate and a source of eggs (or possibly embryos), which may or may not be donated by the surrogate.

In this chapter we discuss some of the ethical debates surrounding same-sex parenting, which we define as gay or lesbian couples becoming joint parents using gametes or embryos from a third party. We are not considering issues for those of other sexual orientations. Our discussion is confined to the context of countries where same-sex relations are legal and where lesbian women and gay men have at least some access to parenthood through donation. The legal and social implications for same-sex parenting outside of this context, as well as lesbian and gay (L&G) rights more generally, are beyond the scope of this chapter.