ENCOUNTERING the concept of sociability was for me a kind of magical portal into history. I had been working on ‘conversation in the eighteenth century’, originally to understand why French conversation was such an important feature of eighteenth-century gentlemen and ladies’ education. When reading the Spectator and L. E. Klein's Ph.D. thesis ‘The Rise of “Politeness” in England, 1660–1715’, I realised that conversation was not just talk but was the ultimate expression of a set of practices performed within a specific and crucial context, sociability. In its most essential meaning, it refers to the ability of people who are not necessarily related by blood or alliance to relate to each other in society. While the term sociability is mostly used by historians, it is now virtually taken for granted, due to the pervasiveness of social media. Thinking about the similarities and differences between sociability in the eighteenth and the twenty-first centuries, I was struck by what these can tell us about human interaction.

What struck me most about sociability, when I first began to study it, was its aim to be an ‘ideological space’ where social equality could be practised despite other inequalities. Sociability in the eighteenth century had to be tempered by politeness and the requirement to observe rules of bienseance – tact, civility and putting the needs of the group before one's own. In our own time, modern social media too provide a virtually infinite space for people to communicate, regardless of race, class or religion, as long as the technology is available. In theory, social media allow sharing and the conquering of difference and selfishness. In practice, as they develop, issues about observing propriety in the face of ‘trolling’ behaviour have come to the fore. These contradictions and how the people involved negotiate them are central to all forms of sociability in any age, and they are a central focus of this book.

This collection of essays is not an attempt to bring together a variety of harmonious views on sociability.