What is it really like to be a child growing up in England these days? Is it a happy time? Is there too much to worry about? What are the best and worst aspects of being young? This chapter looks at how children and young people perceive their childhoods and the constraints they face. It also reports on how adults remember their own childhoods.

Happy childhoods?

All childhoods are different and, not surprisingly, the existing evidence suggests that most young people are reasonably content most of the time while some are very unhappy.

Several studies are illustrative. Ghate and Daniels (1997) found that around three quarters of a sample of almost 1,000 8- to 15-year-olds growing up in the 1990s regarded themselves as happy. All the same, over one in three, and more girls than boys, said they were ‘sometimes sad’. Having friends, doing things with friends, or going out with friends, followed by doing things with family members, ‘getting presents’ or ‘having birthdays’, were the things that most commonly made them happy. Taking part in or watching sports, and doing well at school, were also commonly mentioned. ‘Other people being hurt, frail, sick or upset’ (mentioned by a third of the sample overall but by more girls than boys), being left out, feeling excluded, or breaking up with friends, made them sad.

Children's happiness may depend, to some degree, on context. Madge and Franklin (2003) asked almost 3,000 young people at secondary school how happy they were at home and at school, and found that although there was a significant correlation between those feeling happy at home and at school, children were more likely to report feeling happy at home than at school. Overall, 89% of boys said they were always or often happy at home while 58% said they were always or often happy at school. For girls, the proportions were 84% and 66%.

Balding (2002) examined self-esteem, which seemed related to happiness, among almost 16,000 primary and secondary children. The majority of pupils showed medium or high self-esteem, but a significant minority did not. At all ages, more males had high self-esteem and more females had low self-esteem – although gender differences were not found in all schools.