from BOOK VII
I was truly concern'd at the injustice which I perceived poor Deidamia sustained, and but little pleas'd with eutracia, either for the information she had given her of it, or for advising her to detect Meroveus in the manner concerted between them; – indeed, I fear'd that the consequences of such an interview would be only to make the husband become more harden'd in his guilt, and her affliction increase by finding her resentment disregarded.
Few men can bear reproofs, much less reproaches; – if ever they quit a darling folly the reformation must come of themselves: – it must proceed from a consciousness they have done amiss, not from being told so by others; – there is a pride in human nature which disdains admonition, and makes us persist in error, which, if not taken notice of, perhaps in time we might discover to be such, grow ashamed of, and amend.
Besides, remonstrances from a person whom we look upon as any way our inferior, either in point of understanding or circumstances, will be so far from having any weight, that they will rather add to our contempt, and, it may be, raise in us an utter aversion to the giver: – Custom has made the husband so much the head of the wife, that, tenacious of his authority, it is but seldom that he submits to be influenced by her in matters of much less moment to him than his pleasures.
Indeed, when a woman is wrong'd in the manner Deidamia was, it must be confess'd that the shock is greatly trying, and that she has the strongest reason for complaining; – yet will she still find it most prudent to forbear: – love and gentleness are the only weapons by which that sex can hope to conquer, and she who attempts to have recourse to any other only hurts herself.
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